Blue Suit Theory (update)

Writing my previous post on my "Blue Suit Theory", as a fresh faced, new to London- laborer, I built a theory on the reach of a man in a blue suit. 

A blue suit gets you noticed, it speaks of some untold image that represents success....Perhaps I built this theory based on the sights of Mayfair. Where only the rich of the rich are able to socialise in the hidden gems that the average person would never have known existed. 

Heading to one of the secretive gentlemen's clubs (which membership would cost you an arm and a leg) you'll find a certain type of man. One who probably has more money that sense, but rarely seen on London streets outside of the summer months will be those few showing off the colour swatch..

Daring Monaco Blue       -      Blue Spring       -       Mayfair's Elite       -   Winter Break      -        Navy           

Now I mentioned previously that very few exist under the age of 30, and whilst back in 2011 this seemed a little unappealing to me, the tables have now turned, and the just turned 30's - 30 somethings are my prime market!

Nearing 30 myself, well at least over the hill in my 20's, I have come to accept that this is an age that I am going to meet- sword raised or charged. Not such an unappealing age now.

Also, to disprove my theory that they are over the age of 30 is a young man who I met whilst interning in my early London days, who certainly proved that part of the theory wrong. Despite, like me, starting out as an intern - but he had quit school early- did not attend University and now owns a multi-million pound property company, and  I'm starting to wonder whether education was the right route. 

A now very successful northern boy, who from the start had impeccable dress sense (owning a blue suit even then), soared almost to the top of his game (there's always room for improvement), at the grand ol' age of 25. Not only at the time was he younger than me, but he moved from a job already on twice what I could even consider as a start out salary. Success is not always found in the classroom- as many have shown. 

Here's to you, you northern success (and your blue suit that got you there)! x

Wedding Season

We are at that time of year where everybody hopes that the sun will shine on their big day.....and it did for a lovely couple who both could not be more deserving and perfect for each other!

My "go to outfit" for this type of occasion is normally some figure hugging number, that accentuates my waist and hips. 
This is a good website, that is quite interactive with assisting with items to suit your figure - Shop Your Shape


For the past few weddings I have sought comfort in a Hitchcock pencil number, both from ASOS.



                 
Originally, I was not a huge fan of purple, but gradually the colour has grown on me and I now have a few items in my closet on the purple spectrum.  I wore the pale blue patterned dress to a wintry New Years Eve wedding, which was  hit, even with my pale peachy skin tone.


This time I decided to try something a little bit different, a two piece outfit. I was surprised at how many compliments I received - I am now more inclined to try something a little bit different again.

Top from ASOS - Kimono Crop Top With Obi Tie And Open Back

Skirt from Oasis : Satin full skirt
(hurry they are disappearing fast!)

The little munchkins wanted to get involved.

Shoes from River Island Sale, I always seem to miss the best sale offer, but still bought at a discount! :)

Amster-damned!

Lift-off

To help console an old friend through a tough time, I did what I do best, and booked us a spontaneous trip to Amsterdam (I can hardly call myself spontaneous much these days – as I try to keep as busy as possible to distract myself from a failing love life!) But – a 2 month wait, wasn’t long to look forward to….

A long weekend away was just what I needed too! It must be engagement season, friends and family making that once in a lifetime commitment. It was just drawing more attention to the fact that suffering the;  as Bridget Jones quoted “fears of dying alone and being found three weeks later half-eaten by an Alsatian” is NOT an option.

 We jetted off, leaving the luxury of  BA’s
Terminal 5 (unfortunately not first 
class),in the early hours of one Friday 
morning…. To the land of Tulips!

Scenery

Despite Amsterdam’s famous sites of the Red Light District, it does have to be one of the most beautiful and scenic cities I have been to. Don’t get me wrong, the ladies are very beautiful, possibly even the one whose style was inspired by Jodie Marsh – but not the scenery I was heading for. These girls can charge up to €80 a time, I also charge by the hourly rate (in the professional context), but I will be lucky to see even 10% of mine.... who's really getting screwed? 

I've sourced my own window, should I need it.... 

We took a boat trip to see the Seven Bridges of Reguliersgracht, which is one of the most photographed sights in Amsterdam . The Reguliersgracht is illuminated at night and really captures the beauty of this canal – unfortunately, I was not fortunate enough to witness this up close!
 But I did manage to capture my own little moment past the Reguliersgracht (once waking from a little nap due to being up for 24 hours!)

 

We managed to fit in a spot of shopping -for the H&M lovers, you are not lost for choice. We managed to map at least six H&M’s within a one mile radius.

Night-life

The nightlife is amazing, so many bars to choose from, even for those with the most tired eyes will be perked up by the atmosphere. We spent two evenings in Amsterdam, partying to the late hours of the early morning! Leidseplein and Rembrandtplein, were great areas for us, perhaps a little commercialised, but the atmosphere and music was just what we wanted.

Club Rain on Rembrandtplein was a great classy atmosphere, fantastic music – I honestly could have stayed here all night. On request the DJ kindly gave us his contact details to send us his set list – I was in my drunken element! Drinks are surprisingly not too pricey either.

Escape, one of Amsterdam’s big clubs – was the place to go to continue your night until morning – great music, variety of VIP, lounge and bar areas to choose from. Platform podiums for the masses to do battle to mount for the privilege of now dancing like someone out of an Impulse advert. Thankfully, there were a few gentlemen around to aid our peril, and draw some space around us to dance.
 I managed to meet a southern English boy. Apparently, when I have had one too many, I lose all comprehension of judging a person’s age. I feel I must state that he was of a consensual age. However, despite him being a very lovely boy, the only thing I felt myself offering him at the end of the night, was whether I could take him home for milk and cookies?
 

Next time, I would love to meet someone with local knowledge to show me round the hidden gems of the city.

Amsterdam – it took me a week to recover from you….. but that may just be my age catching up with me…. Until next time.

A Year in bed, and I am finally now waking up - Summer 2014

I attended the wedding of one of my oldest friends, from the moment she walked down the aisle to the point where her Dad read out the first line of his speech, I did not stop balling my eyes out! 

The first one of my friends to flee the nest. It felt rather strange, someone of my age able to own a house and get married. I still see myself as a young fresh faced teen with mummy and daddy to support me. It got my thinking… when am I going to start doing something productive with my life….. I

 found out towards the end of last year, that our parents and their parents’ generation has totally screwed us all over to ever be able to afford mortgage repayments as a single person. It is that unwritten rule, that I discover every single day….. to buy a house, to go on more holidays than your friends, to do most things you need the commitment of a long term partner. Well, when your track record consists of dating A***h***** you're not going to find that happy ending!

Soo…naturally…. I found myself getting to know the best man…. We spent a few months getting to know each other, and for the first time in a long time, I thought.. this could actually turn into something. I planned a lovely evening in London only to find I would be spending it with a friend instead. I received countless apologies throughout the evening into the weekend. I finally decided to pull together some unaffected response, and leave it at that. I should have known to leave it there, but he did the one thing that I said I no longer wanted to do, I had spent the last year finding myself a little, finding comfort in the bed of some stranger.

Back tracking January 2014 - I dumped the one guy who I met last New Years Eve who could have actually been the most decent guy I had met I in a long while, for “The Dentist” I considered him an upgrade. But in the circumstances, he seemed to have it all, and I wanted it! The moment you meet someone in a bar, and one nicknamed the “meat market”, where all the Londoners flee for some after work drinks and….. – let’s face facts, it was not going to be Prince Charming!!

I saw my sister tie the knot with her now husband…. In the venue I would have chosen. Knowing that when it comes to style we are at opposite ends of the spectrum - this choice of venue could have melted any girls heart…. We were blessed with the most perfect weather….surrounded by people we love, even those who had trouble attending.

Seeing my Grandma who now expresses a very vacant look of expression, remembering the time she grew up in….. where courting was high on any man’s agenda. Glancing at my sister-to-be’s grandparent’s well in their 90’s still happily married and wishing that one day despite my façade of jokes, I will to meet my Mr Right and grow old and grey with him.

 I have had more attention (not always good) in the last year than a boys PlayStation at Christmas… but technology these days is very short-lived much like my dating life!  

Belated Christmas Cheer.....

It happens every time…..Another year over…..

Yet again I acknowledge that I am not really cut out for blogging!

1. I am no Bridget Jones

 I cannot attract good looking men with my curvy hips and sarcastic humour. I do not walk around my apartment in my underwear, (for two reasons; I do not own my own apartment; and watching my wobbly bits in every reflective service is not on the list of things to help my ego!) However, I would love a Mr Cleaver and a Mr Darcy running round my little finger…. A girl can dream!

2. I am very lucky to have a rather busy social life.....because in between attending the bank to ask for money and going on holidays what else shall I spend my money on?

2013-2014:

I became an Aunty again in April 2012, and celebrating the first birthday of my happy little niece with her older and wiser cousin – makes life’s little moments that even more enjoyable!

I have been on countless holidays with a group of girlies from University.

I have been to Sweden, France, Austria, Ireland, Ibiza. I want to travel (if you could really call Ibiza “traveling”) some more, but hopefully one day with just one other person……

Christmas 2014

So whilst coming to the realisation that it’s only Christmas Eve and you are already doing the “jean dance” having spent the majority of December eating and drinking with friends and family, you need to get back on the wagon and start practicing for the charity run in February.

Week one

You thrive on the burst of energy and excitement that in a few more months (if you can keep it up), you can get back into those high-waisted shorts that men hate so much!

Week two

Running that little bit further within the same time……running in the fresh blue air, I can start to see some of the enjoyment of running - Some time to yourself to reflect… but after about 20mins, I stop reflecting and spend the rest of the time fighting against the urge to quit and walk home!

Week three

This is getting a bit old and tiresome now… all I want to do is sit and eat!! Thankfully, I allow myself a week off to enjoy Christmas!

Although, having spent the last year squeezing back into my size 10 jeans… I know I don’t want to go back! So I hold back from having my third helping of Sainsbury’s “all out” chocolate yule time log (AMAZING!!) Despite not really actually holding back at all, the weight has not at all fluctuated above what bad habits I had developed the weeks leading up to Christmas….. WIN!

Tube Travel

You know those days when you arrive at the station in rush hour, and after a 20min train journey of being squashed like a sardine (thanks FGW)  the last thing you wanted was the same occurrence on the tube… this comes to mind…..My new business plan “a tube chauffeur”….

…maybe not!

My tube journey experiences vary, I could join the rest of the population and stand with a stern look on my face that says “talk to me before my 3^rd cup of coffee and I cannot be responsible for my actions”. However, I opt for (most days) the “I’m away with the fairies at the moment, but for you to call back…..”

One thing that really gets my goat on the tube, is that in the smallest of spaces ( in the height of summer) people still make the decision when they wake up in the morning to not wear deodorant! I am some day’s physically in pain by the humming stench that people expel!

The drunk Scotsman

Do not let the title fool you, he was not Scottish, I think I am however 100% correct that he was drunk!

You are standing (again) opposite a girl who just pushed past you to get on to a surprisingly empty carriage lobby (you know to get that space by the end of a row of seats, where you can lean against the glass and not touch any poles avoiding any germs or be accused of falling on anyone as you are well braced against the door and wall of glass), earphones in ears, happily nodding along to …..a Christmas song (in April)…..When the Scotsman and a friend approach your carriage lobby.

The train pulls off, and despite having a firm grip on the pole he falls onto you, hand at chest level to brace himself……(forget about Tubecrush, I had my 156^th boobcrush)  I laugh it off and ironically  revert to  “you scumbag, you maggot, you cheap, lousy… “ before he then pipes up with what he thinks is an overly hilarious comment….”Excuse me, does this train go to Scotland?” (You see the reference now!) I reply politely, but with a hint of Sarcasm “Yes - it goes all the way” expecting not to hear another word….

The train pulls off again and surprise surprise I am yet again engulfed by yet another accidental fall followed up with “I could have kissed you then!”  I decide at this point to pretend I did not hear, turning to the girl who stole my space (yes stole) where we share an awkward giggle. Thank god I can get off at the next stop!  Does he not know he is in that crap age group (40-odd) where he is too young to marry for money, and too old to marry for the.. Sex Drive.

Belly Bucket

Short and sweet – fat man gets on an already crowded train, squashes his tub of lard into my side and armpit….. you shuffle over slightly to allow for a bit of distance between you, he takes that to be “thanks, I’ll shuffle over as well.”  Attempt two: repeat process – shuffle… “free of belly bucket” ….doh – he shuffles again too, I start to think he can see this annoyed look on my face and is deliberately winding me up! He finally gets the message when I stick my elbow out to the side, and it somehow gets lost in his stomach, it must have caused him a slight itch, as he swiftly turned around.

Monday Morning Wind-up

Anyone else make the journey from Paddington to Baker Street, Baker Street to Bond Street? …. Well you will be aware of that junction when you arrive at Baker Street and make your dare devil move to cross to the other side against any which way traffic in rush hour….you will be lucky to leave with your life!

I don’t threat this journey, I do it every day (I thank the moment the netball teacher took us over the process of “dodge, Dodge! DODGE!”) Then from out of no-where I trip, it definitely was not my own foot.  Some lady (I can only assume it was a lady as there were humps in the chest region despite the face saying otherwise) manages to hook her foot between mine causing me to almost fall flat on my face, stretching out that little further in a dramatic attempt to catch my brand spanking new sun glasses! I turn around (as you do – which one of you was it…) I turn back round regaining my posture, only to then feel a swift push between the shoulder blades….I swing back round to find the same man/women glaring at me, and like verbal diarrhoea she splutters out “I said sorry, do not glare at me”, at that moment I was too shocked to say anything, for a split second I thought to myself, did that actually just happened – did someone trip me, THEN push me for not turning around and smiling adoringly at her…..

She barges past me rambling on about how I didn’t acknowledge her apology, (firstly I had ear phones in, so I apologise for not hearing her ‘muttered under breath’ apology. (She continues… bla bla bla bla….) I finally come to my senses and shout back at her “I am ever so sorry that my initial reaction was not to smile and ask you out to dinner!”

I start laughing at her ridiculous audacity to what she had just inflicted upon me, the cheek of it? The complete and utter nerve to push me for not thanking her for tripping me!?

Still to this moment I am in shock, that is not the English way!!!

The Executive Decision

MOVE ON – CHANGE IS GOOD!

After practically begging a company to give you a job despite having no experience in that industry you succeed with a little help from your friends.

You plan your leaving drinks only to move 3 floors up....

#Epicfail Your wing woman retires at 9pm!

You find the strength to go on without you wing women, and secretly you thank her for that because you are a big believer in how events all have an effect on the future, and the events that followed may not have happened if she stayed.


Because for the first time in a long while (who cares if they were slightly incapacitated – it still counts, right?) the hot guy who you have been pining over for the last 6 months travels home with you.


It is after an engaging (drunk) conversation that you realise you need to change trains. Aussiehottastic offers to wait with you on the empty platform .... and while you are waiting he takes a wide birth (which for you seems to be going in slow motion)... or maybe it is and you are both too drunk to carryout swift movements and tries to plant one on you – what is your reaction to the guy who you have been pining after for the last six months (after of course first anxiously worrying what you breath smells like)


Bet both you and him were certainly not expecting a palm to the face, not a slap, but a full on but light “spam” to the face – really? Did I actually just do that?!


Overall an attempted kiss on the central line platform is in my eyes a definite upgrade of romance to a poke on facebook!


Well done N if you had not ruined your chances prior to this of ever kissing him – you certainly made a tactful move and FUCKED it up now!


But you reassure yourself you were taking the high road knowing that if you were his gf – you would want another girl to do the same.


After a few moments of awkward laughter your train soon arrives which he waits for you to get on. You sit down smiling uncontrollably because you conjure up a deluded thought that he may like you. As your train catches up to him finding his way to the exit you see him walking with his head in his hands most certainly thinking “what am I doing?” As the train passed I got a smile and a wave goodbye.

I definitely made the wrong right decision!


First day on the new job you have to deal with added pressure of the elephant in the room, because you have created this feeling of awkwardness that probably was not even there, but neither of you mention it and you assume he was too drunk to remember as he is genuinely a lovely guy and on any normal occasion wouldn’t dare cheat on his gf.